Creepy

By Alan Tapley

Editor’s note:  Alan Tapley is the parent of two female swimmers, ages twelve and fourteen.  Over the past eight years he has been with them at hundreds of meets and practices.  He has had countless conversations with swimmers about what they would like the public to know about their pursuit of this grueling sport.

When the kids were young our swim meets were filled with sun and laughter.  I’d show up with sunscreen, a few beverages, and at the end of most races, a dry towel and a hug.  A dad and his young girls.  I was applauded for being so involved, so present in the moment, and so affectionate to my kids.  But as the girls got older, well, to be honest, I felt kind of creepy.

The top five reasons that swim dads are creepy.

1)      We are constantly waiting outside of a girl’s locker room.  Young women are changing and showering and swim dads are the creepy guy that sits just a few yards from the locker room doors. 

2)      We are the guy who sits in his car in the high school parking lot as young teenagers stroll by. And the one who sits all alone in the parking lot near the pool or recreation center at 5am, most likely unshaven and unprofessional looking.

3)      We are the one that frequents all the swim meets as a fan, volunteer, or official as young teenage girls and boys wear immensely small and inappropriate bathing attire that covers way too little.  And we spend hour after hour there.

4)      We are the one that offers food and snacks to young children that aren’t ours.  It’s hardly a stranger offering candy, but it’s still an old guy offering a kid a granola bar or a chocolate milk.

5)      We are the guy who records and photographs wet kids with major wedgies.

Believe me.  It’s creepy.